parole vuote. lo amo.

It's been quite awhile; I thought it will happen, I thought I'll have the courage to do such a thing but It's almost been a year and nothing seems to happen. This words still need to set free but it doesn't matter anyway, It didn't really matter from the first day. In the first half of the plot; it definitely brought so much change. You build up a beautiful wreck in my life, like an old dusty picture reincarnated again and built with a frame to hold onto. You built a strong esteem in me before the breaking and falling of the frame hence I shall thank you for that. Though I still have the picture with me, and I know I have a very small chance to prove that we can still fix that frame of yours know that we're all moving onto our new lives. We were both protagonist of the plot, it's just that destinty seems to be the villaine of our story and I can't make you change what you really feel; I don't know if this might take forever but I will never forget it.

Who am I to say those words, This could be something to do with you but I'd rather keep it to myself and leave the gaps between us than filling it up with my blood. You may have a bad memory, and maybe so do I, but I remember every single time we say goodbye. Goodbyes that hurt me every single time and made me think that life is way too unfair, but then I think deeper and made me realize that maybe it's destiny that made us fall apart, and maybe it's just your heart. and maybe those words need to be keep inside a bottle along with the picture and thrown away in a sea full of hatred, yet there's always a "YET' in every harsh things I say, because the truth is I can't let it go each and every day.

(Kudos for you for finding out this ones for you, but It's not like you'll ever find it but If you do I hope this might leave you a smile through you face, because this is the part where I'll say how much I do care for you)

Thank you.

Everything is abit upside down for me; How I'm acting lately.
For the times I have dissapointed you. You gave your everything and I have done nothing. It's not too late; I know. but It may take a lifetime for me to forgive myself.

Classics.

I use to do this, and now I still know how.

Back when I was in 2nd grade me, charlyine & michael always do this. Until we got scold by the teacher.


We use this on our cheerleading song when I was in grade 5. We remixed it. Grabee, sobrang kapagod yun eh. I was a cheerleader since grade 4 to 6. Nung nag H.S. wala na, tinamad na.
Imagine? This was around gr.5 and now I'm in my Senior days. WOOOOW. I feel so old, gawsh. I need to go back in my grade school days.

Voltes 5, Sineskwela (Sp), DragonBallZ, Wansapanataym.
I can still remember alooot of songs, movies, shows, moments back when. Hahah.
Its amazing that just one blinked of an eye all of a sudden your already growing up next thing you knew you already grew up.

He is not, but he is today.

I miss this kid, sigh. Everyday was a holiday when she was here. She always wanted me as a sister and vice versa, Though she's abit of a pest, She's still amazing to be with.

By the way;Ariel I know you'll be reading this. ;)
Thanks for the letter you sent me babygirl! :) I'll try to write a letter soon If I have some time.





It's been a very long time since I did a blog here. Lately I've been using twitter as my little blog.
http://twitter.com/sweetthangxx Might want to follow me. I was listening to Only Human by Diana Lorden last week & I cried; I hate to say this but I really do miss homeschooling. I know you'll think why would I miss that or Homeschooling is very boring, How did she survived and wants to got back? It's because there's no judgemental people, No need to follow anyone, It's all about you, It's all about your rules. When I came back on doing normal schooling I thought it will boost my self-esteem but I guess it only made it worse. You know when you feel as if your giving your 100% and people will not care or worse; They'll joke about it & just laugh (typical ignorant filipino) but I guess I just have to get use to this routine I have; Though sometimes it really makes me sad but that's just the bite of reality. I need to be socialize with people same year of age as I am and indeed I did liked and hated it at the same time. I get to talk and laugh with different people, but the thing is Trust is really hard to give to someone. Especially nowadays.

Many things had happen lately, I've been out to different places and stuffs & I don't think I can name them all and what I did there but I wrote a NEW song. (I don't even know how I got there) =]] It was written long ago, last summer. I only finished it today, I found it under my bags and redo it all over again. I hate how boring this song is but I do hate half of the songs I wrote, So nothing has changed. It's abit personal but this was along time ago thing so I just placed my back in the day self when I was writing this. Here is it:

Anonymous YET

Era

Verse I:

My state of mind is getting clear

but now im losing hope 'cause I know your not here

Losing direction from the pain you gave to me,

oh dear.

Refrain:

I can see the lust inside those eyes.

lies and misery on the outside.

Chorus:

Clear up the lies that you told

Clear up the stories that you fold.

Cant you see?

That I'm breaking to pieces oh baby.

Clear up the things that you said

Clear up the fake things that you made

Day by Day.

Verse II:

And when the night is getting darker

As we linger here in the dark i'm findin the words to say

but the words kept sliping down away.

Now I still remember

All the things that we did back in december

You kissed me with those open eyes

Theres so many things that you have hide to me,

Oh dear.

Refrain:

'Coz I can see the lust inside those eyes

Lies and misery on the outside.

Chorus:

Clear up the lies that you told

Clear up the stories that you fold

Cant you see? that I'm breaking to pieces oh baby.

Clear up the things that you said

Clear up the fake things that you made

day by day.

Bridge:

You said that you've changed

You said you'd behave

but your still the same old jerk I use to know

You told me past is the past

You told me that it wouldnt last

but tell me why you havent clear that.

Chorus:

Clear up the lies you told me

Clear up the devil whose with me

Cant you see? that I'm breaking to pieces oh baby

Clear up the things that you said

Clear up the fake things that you made

Cant you see that I'm breaking, Im breaking here baby

Clear up the lies that you told

Clear up the stories that you fold

day by day.

Da da da da.